One of the most important aspects of selling is establishing rapport and bonding with the prospect. Even in transaction selling (a one-time sale) the buyer
wants to find something to like about the seller in order to do business. It is crucial in relationship selling (repeat sales or follow-up customer service after
the sale) or you may never sell to that customer again. Guess what? Establishing and maintaining rapport happens throughout every step of the selling
process, not just at the beginning of the meeting. Every call, email, text message, conversation you have with that prospect either gets you closer or farther
apart in terms of building a relationship.
Here are a few thoughts I’ll share from experience on building rapport with prospects:
Work on the relationship first. People want to know you care, before they care what you know. We know that people buy from people they trust, and they are
more likely to trust someone they like. So it’s important to behave in ways that make you likable.
It starts with the way you greet someone and shake hands. Smile and have a firm handshake, no limp fish handshake. From there it is saying things that build
a bond of trust, and behaving in a way that builds rapport with your prospect. I don’t mean making small talk, or commenting about something you see on the
wall. Many salespeople misconstrue that as rapport.
Rapport means “to bring back, to report back” so that a connection is made between you. You can mirror and match the person’s tonality, the pace of their
speaking, the pitch of their voice, the body language they have, their favorite pet phrases. You become a chameleon. People are most comfortable with
themselves. So when they see you begin to look and sound as they do, it lowers the typical buyer defense shields. It also means using active listening skills.
Paraphrase or repeat back to make sure you understand – people like to know that they are being understood, not merely heard.
People tend to use one of three senses the most when they talk – sight, sound, or touch. You should match those kinds of words when you respond. A visual
person would wave their hands in gestures as they paint a picture in space with their words. You would hear words such as “bring into focus” or “clear-view”
or “see eye to eye.” For an auditory person, they choose their words carefully and speak at a moderate pace, saying words like “that rings a bell” or “I hear you
loud and clear.” The kinesthetic person would want to touch brochures, would take the most time when speaking because they want to “get in touch with” or
“come to grips with” what they are feeling.
Assignment
Read the attached article “Four Ways to Build Rapport.pdf” (below) and practice what you learned with another person (a trusted friend, colleague, student,
spouse, etc.) for about 15 minutes. You can talk about anything as you practice. Have some fun with it. Take turns and give feedback to each other.
1. Practice making a paraphrase or restatement. Did it cause your prospect to clarify what they were saying? Or did they confirm you heard them correctly?
2. Let your prospect do the talking. Mirror his/her body language for at least two minutes. After two minutes, intentionally change your posture and see if
your prospect mirrored your change. If he/she did, then rapport happened at a subconscious level. Did this happen? Why/why not?
2. Practice pacing. Match the rhythm, tone, and pitch of your prospect. Did you find this easy or hard to do without it seeming unnatural or forced?
4. Practice matching word style using the file Primary Sensory Dominance Samples (below). Identify his/her word style. Was your prospect using visual,
auditory, or kinesthetic words? After you identify his/her style, start matching the same style. Did you find this easy or hard to do without it seeming unnatural
or forced?
5. Which of the four methods was the most effective for you? Do you feel these methods will help you build rapport in your communication now that you are
aware of it?